Last Blog part 2

Im going to end on a slightly better note.  When I moved out here, i didnt imagine that my resources or contacts would be lacking.  I guess its just a dissapointment to be more adjusted then my cousin who lived out here way before me, and now to have him live in my house, and just kind of be pathetic, is a bumber, cant relax when hes around, so always shuffling rooms.  And the job hunts been tough, not really sure what to do, applied for jobs online today and took the bus around town.  Found a place called bread hiring, going to bring my resume to them.  But I will say this, the one day i got that audition was awesome, if I could find myself working towards that, and find myself in that position more Id be one lucky bastard, and could cancel all the shit that comes with moving somewhere nowone knows you and the few you do that you see often are worthless.  BUt thats also refreshing that means I can ditch them, leave them behind, and do me.  Well I think that was more positive.  Haha
Later blog

Last Blog

So I sought out a church again on sunday.  The pastor really annoyed me i skipped out early and it was akward haha.  Im comin to terms with that Im not going to find what I had back home, but something new.  I am the only one that will be able to find it.  Trying is not enough, I have to do what I came here to do, and I have to trust myself.  I think i should have went home for vacation, i definetly neeeded it, but will have to muster up something to focus on my life.  My focus has been totally out of whack and weeks upon months have been wasted even though I have been working hard, its been a lack of focus.  Ive always been successful, because I have always just been me, Ive done what I wanted to do, and it is always worked out for me.  My friend Taylor out here asks me to do a lot of projects but I have found my future answers will be no.  Im too damn smart to let anyone drag me around to stuff thats not worth my time or attention.  I really am not enjoying my life at all right now, and would like to change it.  So this will be my last blog post for now.  I will see you when times are different.
Eric 

Not what I thought Id type

Well, I dont know if I have much to blog, this one may even get deleted.  All I could think about on the way home from glee today was to blog on the horrors of extra work.  I certainly do have a lot more knowledge about it, but, I am going to hold back, i think, haha, just because even though I dont see light in extra work, doesnt mean i have to be angry, but I am right, and i know that, because Im smart.  Alright fellas things arent really looking up or down, i think, but, believe me, i know this sentance structure is awful right now, anyway back to my point, things have to change, i have got to change, and I must be willing.

Eric

So it is early august and its coming to that time were i came here last here almost.  I have better headshots, an agent, and probably a little moral knowledge than I did last year, which is all great, but what I really need is to get that fire back, and I still need to get a job which really sucks.  My soccer job just has not panned out I hope I did not give up on that too early, but oh well, we have to take it from here now anyway.  So I have been applying online for jobs today, I hate to say it but it seems pretty pointless, when did I start going about this all wrong.  Anyway.  Im doing extra work again, purely for the money, I am well aware that its not really a way to advance your career, 3 sag vouchers could come over time but that would require you to possibly be sitting in extra seats for ages, not always but I have realized that extra work is not the route of the serious actor, and I know this, but I am desperate for money, which is nothing new.  I havent stood up on a stand up comedy stage yet which is really too bad.  I dont know, Do I need to keep agent shopping, am i going down the right path, how come its always just a stress to even leave the house, all these questions and many more flood my mind while I write this post.  What I tink I need to do, is continue agent shopping, churhc shopping, gig shopping, job shopping.  I would really be thrilled if I could support myself and hopefully to be able to move out of this apartment complex that I live in with three guys, all who are pretty lazy and not much of a motivational booster, but I got to find Eric, forget them.  I havent been home in a long time which sucks, i thought for awhile that it might really boost my spirits to get back but I seem to be stuck in this wallowing abyss which hopeuflly will all pay off someday.  I dont really have anyone i talk to on a regular basis about things, my family calls me now and then and i have a good art/life conversations with my uncle Mike and friend Jeff from time to time.  I come to blog today at 4pm which is a very early blog for me, I have not ate today, it seems like every trip to get food is a stress so, it just makes me ansy, like there is never a good time to go to the grocery store i just dont get it, I also felt like that over the summer last year so I dont know what is all about really, adjusting i guess.  I cant give up by by God I have to find a way to get going, i feel like since I got here its just been me grasping for straws, if only i knew what to do Id freakin do it, i think, but, until next time, hopefully i can turn it around in somway and report back.
Eric

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