South Dakota

Alright I feel like I had some good forward moving thoughts today.  Its the story of a kid from a galaxy far away called South Dakota who understood that coffee was one of his basic freedoms.  I did some writing today, I did some running today, it was a good day, did the works, applied for jobs, sent out postcards.  Man I wish I had a car haha, the dude needs a car man.  I even filmed some like thought stuff today which I thought might be a waste of time but after doing it I see that it kind of helps me formulate my ideas.  At the end of the day I had like a 3 hour psychological panic, it was shorter than that but it felt like 3 hours, and it was not a panic, it was just a zone out or something.  Im not sure why, I think its just, idk, I just need to keep moving forward that's all.  Whatever I do moving forward is always good, even go ahead and take risks and fail that's fine too that's fine.  Just not being afraid of anything is the important thing I think.  So that is my goal is that I dare myself to take risks, ask people to do projects, write my own projects, not a bad idea because then you start building yourself a reel, barring you work is good enough for a reel but something must be better than nothing, or at least its worth finding out whether it is or not.  

Another Day

Woke up at 6am today.  Did some morning Yoga.  Cleaned up around the house applied for a few jobs online, got a coffee and breakfast food for the first part of the week.  I ran to the bank, came back, and then took the bus to my audition.  I was pleased with my audition, I felt like I did a good job reacting and doing non verbal things well, the non verbal auditions had been the ones Id been struggling with and this one went really well.  I did my job and I feel good about that.  Went to Amobea records bought a two dollar Steve Martin movie which Im watching right now its actually pretty good.  I picked up postcards I ordered about a week ago from argentum photo lab and also got mailing labels.  Came back to the house did some taebo.  Then I took the bus to the Actors Gang and auditioned for a school actually.  I don't necessarily intend to join the school but it is something I signed up for quite awhile ago and its one of those things were you go because you scheduled it.  You never know who your going to run into and you don't want to be known as the guy who does not show up for stuff when scheduled.  Its was a group workout basically and its like I did taebo at the house and then went and worked out even harder at the studio.  A interesting surprise was that one of our teachers in the studio was Tim Robbins who is a famous actor, he is in Shawshank.  So I had to call my friend Brad because that is one of his favorite actors.  I got a burger from and fri from inn and out.  Today was sort of productive and also not really, but kind of, a strange mixture.  But today felt like a morale win at least.  And yes I mean morale, not moral.  I know a lot more proactive work needs to be done but Im going to be positive about today, its a start.  Alrighty then, that about wraps her all up.
Dude Abides

Writing again

So I actually wrote a pretty substantial blog and then all the sudden the page got deleted.  It happens.  I was writing about ways I need to be more proactive and how I need to pick it up and be hungry again basically, and I also wrote some new things I was looking into like Second City which may be worth looking into.  Im basically trying to stay in the moment and keep a positive outlook on things because that is what Ill need to crawl my way back into a good place in my head and to have good motivational vibes to kind of power me towards achieving my goals and not getting so side tracked with things that are not important.  I think I keep telling myself Im going to do it tomorrow and that attitude doesn't get much done.  What I have here is something that needs to be delt with now, however I gotta do it, do it now.  I don't want to be hard on myself but I want to motivate myself, just try and work hard enough to breath again so I can see the light and live in the moment.  Anyway, I got new headshots and postcards to be sent out, going to be consistent with that and ordered enough to be.  Like when I auditioned for my agent I didn't get in until about the 6th or 7th or 12th time so I know if Im not auditioning and I am just sending them something I am definetly going to have to be persistent for them to call me.  I will also have to be doing something, right now Im taking classes at the Groundlings but I think my whole life has to be less pinpointed and I just have to be proactive in general so when being asked what Im doing there are all sorts of things to explain because im not just trying to be proactive but my life will have become a proactive thing, so there will be no need to try and demonstrate how if it is.  One of the reasons I am writing this post is that I think I need to continue to do things like this, whether it is in my journal or a blog on the internet.  I must take this time to myself and lets this be a part of my proactive journey.  Another side thought is while I wish sometimes I was much further than I am, and I really still do, I realize that you know its just here for the taking as long as your being proactive that's all that matters, and also, Im starting to realize that some people out here have kind of quit on the acting thing.  So when you do things you have to do to pay bills and such don't feel so bad about it not lining up PERFECTLY because your doing it for your goal, so if you can remember that and just stay focused on it, keep at it and you will reach that level of maybe not perfection, but hitting your groove.